lesley crewe

author

Bah Humbug

on December 19, 2011

Being the enviromentalist that I am, on top of being the laziest person in the world, I put all my gifts in bags this year; pretty bags I’ve received over several Christmas’s. There’s not a thing wrong with them, except that the gift tags are from people who are now dead but I can scribble over that.

When I decide to do this task, it’s knowing that family members might barge in at any moment, so I’m in a hurry.  I realize too late that I have no tissue paper to stuff in the bags to hide what lies beneath. I resort to Kleenex and paper towels. Finally another miserable chore done before Christmas.

I ruin everything by mentioning I’ve put everyone’s gift in bags this year. They all look at me in horror.

“BAGS?? That’s no fun!!!”

“That stinks.”

“Where’s the challenge in that?”

Lordy. I have a mutiny, like the time I said maybe I’d have a ham for Christmas. (What was I thinking?). When this news got back to the kids in Halifax, I received phone calls.

 “NEVER. TURKEY OR YOUR LIFE!”  

Or the time I said I wasn’t going to make stuffing. (What was I thinking?)

“NEVER. STUFFING OR YOUR LIFE.”

Once I said I wasn’t going to bake for Christmas. That went well.

“Look,” I say. “I’m saving a tree by using bags. The gifts aren’t that great anyway.”

“Why not use brown paper then or newspaper? Why bags?”

“Have you ever wrapped white socks using newspaper?”

No one cares. They only care that I wrap the gifts like I’ve always wrapped the gifts in the past. With cheap Walmart paper and coloured ribbon. They don’t like the store-bought bows. It’s like the more effort I put into it, the better they like it.

Then my artsy-fartsy daughter comes home with her gifts all wrapped in brown paper tied with raffia, and in that raffia are cinnamon sticks and ivy sprigs and pine cones. I have to admit they do look fabulous.

My nieces give me a hard time about my gift wrapping when I send their Christmas parcel. “Auntie Lelly….all your paper is ripped and the tape doesn’t stick.” I sent their gifts wrapped in duct tape the next Christmas.

So alright….I admit I’m not crafty. I hate crafts as a matter of fact. But because I’m a sap, I’m going to undo all the bags and wrap up the gifts using Christmas paper.

Mothers + guilt = work, work, work.

Ho ho ho.

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4 responses to “Bah Humbug

  1. My sentiments exactly! Couldn’t have said it better myself (well, maybe I could have but it would have involved a swear-word or two…). Great post. Happy Holidays!

  2. Gail Raynard Goulden says:

    Hi, Lesley: I’m with you…. I hate crafts !!! – love your blog ! Hey, is there a book ready yet…. I am in FL and this is the first year I came down with no book from you, personally signed…. but, I have been out of touch lately as I moved out of the city over the summer and had no time for the usual summer stuff – glad all is well with you – luv, Gail

  3. And I wonder what to do with all of the bags! We have stacks and stacks only because I feel having a wrapped present is more exciting than taking it out of a bag but others are getting away with it and I’m left with so many!!

    And it would be wasteful to wrap then put into the bag!

    My inlaws take it a step further in saving though… although they wrap even their small items, they save the “good” paper to send back to Santa to have him wrap all of their stocking items.

    Birthdays seem different though as we often give them in the bag they were bought with. lol

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